Friday, October 24, 2008

Selective Vision

"Alex, wipe up your spill!"

As I watch Alex wipe all AROUND the spill, I wonder, where does he get this vision, this ability to completely ignore the mess right in front of his eyes.

Sadly, I cannot blame my husband for this one!

It is me, all me.
He gets this flaw from me. I have the incredible ability to walk pass any mess (outside of work) and not see it, especially ones I have created.

I have 2 explanations for this, well 3, if I just want to blame myself and my laziness.
The first one is my mom. Now I know, I shouldn't be blaming my mom for my shortcomings, and those of you that know me, know I usually don't do this. However, growing up, I was allowed to lead a completely chore free life. Once or twice a year I took out the trash, and occasionally I was threatened for having a messy room, but overall, my life was completely carefree. No responsibility except for homework and play. Even my mom acknowledges today she should have given me more work, but considering the childhood she had, where she was responsible for so many chores, she just wanted me to be a kid for a while. Thankfully, I recognize that I had an incredible childhood not encumbered by work, so in reality, I should be thanking her for all the time off. (thanks mom!)

The second "explanation" I have is Starbucks, and the 14 years I put in there, plus the other 8 years of retail experience I possess. When you work in Retail, knowing any moment a "bigwig" can walk into your store with your career hanging in the balance, you learn quickly how to keep things looking good and spotless. My employees called it "the eye", and they immediately knew when I spotted a speck of dust, a tiny droplet of a spill or the smallest fingerprint on a window. (It was this "eye" that led me to quit my job in July, but I digress... perhaps we will tell that story another day).
The consequence of having such a keen eye at work, with all the pressures involved in supervising 15 people that can get you fired if they don't do their job, is that by the time you get home, the LAST thing you want to do is clean a mess. However, since I no longer work at Starbucks, I guess I can't really use that one as an excuse either.
Dang it, all out of excuses!

I guess my task is to help Alex grow beyond my issues, or find him a wife one day that doesn't mind cleaning up after him. He has other strengths, like humor, charm, & compassion that I never thought I would be able to see in a three year old.
Besides, his two year old brother Teddy doesn't mind helping me clean up.

Monday, October 13, 2008

The Preschool Experiment

So, Alex started preschool. ahhh... the dilemma.

With battling opinions of experts, including the Grandma's, sometimes you just gotta take a leap and do what you think is best.

Alex is a little behind. He doesn't yet speak more then 20 words, and he doesn't speak in any short sentences. The school district is responsible for getting him the extra help he needs & due to his early birth, he is eligible for benefits other residents don't get (i.e. free speech therapy, occupational therapy, and adapted PE)
These are things you don't even think about when having your first child, after all, no one plans to have a bad pregnancy. Only the super rich could have kids if these were things you deeply considered.

So what is the argument? Some people say "preschool" is code for "daycare". (Disclaimer, I have nothing but support and admiration for mom's who work, and therefore utilize daycare, this is not a debate about whether or not you should be a stay at home mom)
Daycare, implying he is just being 'babysat' and not 'educated'.
My biggest fear is that the next two years will just be a waste of time where I have "pawned" my child off on other people, and my friends and family will look at me like I didn't do my job.

My leap of faith begins, and I place my faith in the special education experts.